When Our Past Gains Weight

I recently learned that German culture has an interesting word that sounds funny to Americans—Trauerspeck. It comes from Germany, and it literally means “grief bacon.” 

The word describes the weight someone might gain during a season of sorrow. Often, when grief settles into our hearts, it shows up in our habits, energy levels, and even on our bathroom scales.

That word reminds us of an important truth:  what we carry inside eventually shows up somewhere.

The same thing can happen to us spiritually.

Many people carry another kind of weight—not around the waist, but in the conscience. It’s the weight of past sins, old failures, and memories that still have a sting. Unlike physical weight, this burden shows up as hesitation in our prayers, insecurity in our service, and quietly distances us from God.

If we’re not careful, our past becomes our spiritual Trauerspeck—a burden we keep carrying long after God has already forgiven it.

God Really Does Forgive

Scripture is very clear:  

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” - 1 John 1:9

“...as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” - Psalm 103:12

“Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,” - Romans 8:1

When God forgives, He forgives fully. He does not keep a hidden record. He does not place us on spiritual probation. He removes condemnation completely.

So, the question is not whether God forgives, the question is whether we will live like we believe He has.

Don’t Re-Sentence Yourself

Readers of the New Testament know the apostle Paul had a painful past. Besides being persecuted for his faith, Paul started out by persecuting Christians himself! Yet he was able to write, “Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” - Philippians 3:13–14

Paul didn’t deny his past—but he refused to let it define him. He trusted that God’s grace was greater than his own history.

When we cling to forgiven sin, it may feel like we are being humble, but in reality, it can become a quiet form of unbelief. It suggests that Christ’s sacrifice was not enough.

Shame says, “You are what you did.” 

The gospel says, “You are what Christ has done.”

Living Like the Cross Was Enough

Hebrews 10:14 reminds us that by one offering Christ has accomplished what was needed. His sacrifice does not require ongoing self-punishment from us. “For by one sacrifice he has made perfect forever those who are being made holy.”

Yes, repentance matters, confession matters—but once God forgives, continuing to carry guilt does not honor Him—it only questions Him.

Accepting forgiveness is not arrogance—it is trust.

The past may explain who we are and where we came from, but it does not own us. The cross stands between who we were and who we are becoming.

And if God has removed our sins as far as the ”east is from the west”, then the only direction left to walk is forward.